The Jackassery Files: Ohio State University Files A Trademark for the word “The” (Yes, I’m Serious)

Posted on Aug 15 2019 - 6:40pm by Richard Walker

Ohio does it again! Ground zero for 95% of America’s sports jackassery has now added another file to its archives. According to a report from NBC News, Ohio State University has filed a trademark application with the US Patents and Trademarks Office to trademark the word “The”. Yes, that’s right, the Buckeyes actually want to trademark the most common word used in the English language (per

School officials filed trademark application #88571984 on Tuesday. The application seeks a trademark on the single word “THE” for use on T-shirts and baseball caps and hats.

For many years, the mouth-breathing fans of the Buckeyes have demanded that their program be called “THE Ohio State University”.

Here’s a note for Ohio State fans – we know that you are “the” Ohio State University, because the sports Gods couldn’t possibly be cruel enough to punish us with a replica program and fanbase that’s anything similar to the idiotbox in the midwest that you call home.

Our host, Mitchell Brock for years has brilliantly referred to Ohio State as “That School In Ohio”. That being said, perhaps we should consider a counter trademark? Hmmm…

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